Welcome to my other blog. I started this one shortly after graduating from the C.I.A, to differentiate between my food and my other thoughts. It's a cozy little place with frequent weird but real, honest thoughts.

There's really not much more to say here, as anything mildly interesting is either down below or written in my Armadillo section above.
Hope you can relate to some of my thoughts and situations, even if they tend to be strange sometimes

Thursday, May 23, 2013

The one year mark.

The one year mark.
I've been staring at the sentence for about ten minutes and I have nothing else to say. Everything I've said in previous posts about my relationship is still true. Except now we're married. I don't know what I or anyone else is expecting out of this post. Oozing love and butterflies and sugar? When I see people in marriages or relationships like that I feel both slightly superior and slightly jealous. Man, those happy tingly feelings of initial attraction are great. You are lightheaded with feelings of "love". But it's not so much "love" as the newness and excitement.
I feel superior because we're well past new romance and deeply into normalcy and into that comfortable phase. A romantic dinner at an overpriced pretencious restaurant? No. A night eating home made pizza while catching Doctor Who? Yes.

Ugh. Why does marriage have to be this grand thing? You're married. You work, you pay bills, you are attached to someone until you either die or get a divorce. Maybe that's a little dark.
You might think I'm taking a pessimistic stance on marriage, but why do I have to be a lovely dovey 'Aint love grand" stance? That's boring and unreal.

I keep hitting the wall with this post. I want to say something special about my marriage, and how wonderful and perfect it is. But that'd be a lie. I think the only perfect and wonderful marriage is that of Prince William and Kate. Don't you just love them? So cute.
I adore my husband. Except when he makes me crazy. I love his satisfied smirk and half glance at me when he gets an answer right while watching Jeopardy. (EDIT: Matt wants me to amend that sentance. He says he only does that when I answer a question right.)  I like that he calls me Jenni. I like his cooking. I like the normalcy and the predictability of our routine.
I like this life we have. WeTv is launching this show "Marriage Bootcamp" Based off the promos, these women appear to be Salon Fresh, fake tanned, spoiled princesses who think marriage is about money and bling. See, there's your problem. I think the key to marriage is being average looking and nearly broke. These women all look the same. The same shade of "tanned" orange. The same long straight hair. Skinny and either too busty or too flat. Scratch that. They all have too big boobs stuffed into too tight tops. They have gigantic rings with more diamonds than I have freckles. Jesus. That's what you get when you marry the Prom Queen. You get what you pay for. Except in this case you don't get anything but very, very large alimony bills. Ha!
Okay, so maybe I'm generalizing. Ehhhh....I can't support that statement. At least when it comes to brides who willingly go on Bridezillas. Ugh, I'd feel badly for these guys, but they put up with it so they can have a hot wife.
What was I saying? Oh yeah. I think the key to a solid marriage is possibly lowered expectations. No, hear me out on this one. If you expect your spouse to make six figures, stay slim and always be a 10, you're gonna have some problems. But if you expect good days, bad days, the flu, a stack of dishes in the sink, tiffs, bills, unconditional love, caring, mutual respect, support, good conversation and quiet nights....You have a pretty good chance at making it. What's that book about careers? Peaks and Valleys. That's life, people.  You'll have days where you're slightly ahead of the game. But then you'll need to get an oil change or replace your phone and you'll be back at square one. That's life. If marriage was perfect we'd all be married and Silver and Gold anniversaries wouldn't be the big deal they are.
But I'm just past the one year mark. We don't know from difficult yet. But I think we'll make it, Matt and I.

EDIT: Matt thinks this post is a wee bit pessimistic. So he wants me to cheer it up a bit. So here's a puppy. 
But allow me to clarify. Our marriage, while might seem dull to others, is the right fit for us. We've discussed at length our dream home. It involves a ranch style house, acres of land for fruit trees, produce, two dogs, a porch, a pond, some low maintence farm animals and a hammock in the garden. The hammock would be used to sip lemonade while reading books with our kids and dozing on lazy summer days. Personally, as long as I have him and a hammock (and a dog or two) I'd be happy. And maybe a few cute kids.