Sometimes I feel like I'm expected to marry someone in my area. Some nice WASP boy from Rowayton from a well-to-do family. Or a boy from Darien with similar attributes? Maybe that's why my family teases me about my boyfriend. A guy with a slight accent from Ohio. Is that why they don't like him? Because a Rowayton girl is expected to marry a Rowayton boy? Am I supposed to marry within my area like good Jewish girls are ''supposed'' to marry good Jewish boys?
I never knew who I'd end up with growing up. I wasn't too concerned with marriage at such a young age. I liked a boy or two in my class, but never exactly thought of long-term outside the crush-spectrum. But was I actually expected to marry one of these guys?! Truly they must have been kidding!! Outside of cute eyes and smiles, and mild personality and intelligence, they didn't have much I wanted to be apart of. Nor where they especially kind to me. The kind of kindness you pity the weird girl with. (Now that I see what these guys have become, I think how lucky I am to have dodged quite a bullet)
But as I became older and got interested in long term things; my education and career, I thought of who I'd want to end up with later on. I knew I wanted to marry a guy who could cook. I loved to bake and knew I was going to go to school for it, so, naturally, I knew I'd meet my husband in college.
And that pretty much satisfied me. Satisfied me from middle school to college. I didn't date (what guy would want the awkward looking girl?) or even really talk to guys (the closest thing I got to a guy in high school were the tom boys in my all girl's school). I knew when I got to college, things would be different. I knew I'd grow into my awkwardness and grow out of my weird looks. I knew I'd find a guy who shared my interests and values. And to me, it made the most logical sence to not invest time and feelings into a relationship as immature as teenage ones that aren't gonna last. Why waste time on a guy in a relationship that was going to end in bitter heartbreak?
So, now I have him. A cook (an especially amazing cook), who's dead smart, sweet, funny, interesting, friendly, polite, understanding, motivated, gentlemanly; all the things a girl could want. Except for the suspecting feeling my family doesn't think of him long term, like I do. I've been with him almost three years, and I'd like to be secure that my family actually approves of him.
I really don't know if they approve. Surely they must know I'm a nervous and neurotic wrek, and take teasing about my appearance, cooking, way of talking, and anything attached to me in general, very seriously. So when I get teased, and even worse, my sister gets to go on these little day trips with her boyfriend who haven't even been together half a year yet, I get a little annoyed.
Anyway. I just wish I knew. "Unfortunetly" I'm one of those girls who cares about what her family thinks of her and her siginificant other, and if there's even a smiggen of discontent, there's going to be problems down the road.